Wednesday, March 23, 2011

if it's meant to be, it will be.

Well I visited number twelve after the airport today. It was just so easy, so nice, so fun to just talk and hang out. I was only there for like forty-five minutes. It felt like ten. He then put windshield washer fluid in my vehicle (I honestly know NOTHING about cars, minus what I've learned from him). He told me that it wasn't long enough, that our hang out session was too short. unfortunately I had to head back to class. I just love that kid. He is just so incredible to just be around. NC thinks I shouldn't be doing this to myself, actually almost everyone does. I appreciate their concern, I really do. To me, a relationship is between the people in it. No one else knows how you feel about each other. And if you're secure, no one else should have to. Now I'm not saying I want to date number twelve right now. But I do love him and he is important to me and if I'm really honest I really don't want to be with anybody right now. I want to be comfortable with who I am. I want to just figure out who I am and who I'm going to be and exactly what I want and don't want in life. He is a really crucial part of my life and from what I feel and see, a crucial part of my future. We both have lots left to do in this world. Plenty of time to grow and change and become the people we're meant to be. And neither of  us know right now whether it will be friends or more but right now, we really don't need to. I guess that's been my issue for the last six months. I've been forcing it so hard and so has he because we just know how much we love each other. But maybe we just need to slow down, enjoy each other's company and see where life takes us.

No comments: