Ain't it funny how it feels burning your wheels somewhere between going and gone.

What a beautiful mess; one part angel, one part perfect, one part brick.

We crash into each other just to feel something.

We went to Jersey Boys tonight. I loved it. I am absolutely exhausted but it was a great show. I truly love broadway productions. Those are actors, artists, creators. Not the people in Hollywood. Don't get me wrong, there is some creative genius there but it's so rehearsed. You don't get the main character pausing to take a now halfway throw the show because he has such an incredible voice the crowd is nearly in a standing ovation 20 minutes in. You can't joke around or play the crowd. It's all so distant and disconnected. Our whole lives are disconnected because we have created barriers that free us from human interaction. We can send an email or a text instead of having to deal with our emotions and discomfort. There's nothing more beautiful than someone giving an incredible performance, raw talent, exactly who they are on display.

All those fairytales are full of it.

One more stupid love song and I'll be sick.

Yuck.

We're going to Calgary for Jersey Boys tonight and I'm not even looking forward to it. I feel so shitty right now and this heat is the worst possible time to be sick.

Let me love you baby let me love you.

You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of you.

Kill me

Something is wrong with me but I don't know what. I went to the gym at like 830 this morning and then I went to the gym. When I got home I started voming and have been ever since. I tried to have some bread and juice but I decided orange juice was a bad idea because acid hurts like a bitch when you Vom it up and I had barely finished my piece of brown toast when I started voming it up. I don't understand.

I wish it were that easy to be done.

I'm done with how it feels spinning my wheels, letting you drag my heart around.

Salt water

Tears, sweat, and the ocean solve everything.

Awkward

I'm still so blown away by the fact sofa king's mom is so oblivious

On a scale of one to awkward that was a twelve.

That awkward moment when you run into the kid who assaulted you's mom and she has no idea and acts like the two of you are still best friends and spends 20 minutes talking to you. #fml

I learned the hard way that they all say the things you wanna hear.

I sometimes wish he knew what the little words meant to me. How much they changed everything in my heart.

A whole new world.

Tell me princess, now when did you last let your heart decide.
- Aladdin

You'd better get to getting on your goodbye shoes.

Lock up all your loving and throw away the key.

A Cinderella Story.

Waiting for you is like waiting for rain in this drought: useless and disappointing.

He loved me.

“@_WilISmith_: If a girl cries over a guy its normal. If a guy cries over a girl he loved her. #Truth”

Eleanor Roosevelt.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

It's just a matter of time.

He's no good girl, no good for you. You'd better get to getting on your goodbye shoes. And go. Go.

I just want a good sleep.

I wish you could choose who you love. I hate that it is out of my control and that I have no say on the way my heart feels. I spoke to number twelve last night and today. He just got back from Bahamas and I'm so jealous. I missed him actually. It was weird to not talk at all for a week. It's like this horrible yet incredible attraction to each other. I don't just mean physically although I am retardedly attracted to him physically. It's like something pulls us in each others direction, like a magnet. And the closer we get, the stronger it gets. It's easier when I'm at school and so is he because we are 2 hours away. Now we are 2 blocks away. And when the person you love most is that close to you, of course you want to be together.
Last night he told me he thought about inviting me for a sleepover but he was too tired and he knows we wouldn't be able to talk like we do. I love laying in his arms. My whole world feels better and I open up unlike any other time with any other person. I feel more safe than I can explain.

I tell myself every day.

I know my heart will never be the same but I'm telling myself I'll be okay.

Cigarettes.

"They used to rush through here, and it was wonderful to watch, it was the hurry of men who knew where they were going and were eager to get there. Now they're hurrying because they are afraid. It's not purpose that drives them, it's fear. They're not going anywhere, they're escaping. And I don't think they know what it is that they want to escape"
-Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged, 61

Miranda Lambert

Gotta keep it together even when you fall apart.

Atlas shrugged

He held his head as if faced with a challenge and found joy in his capacity to meet it. All that Dagny wanted of life was contained in the desire to hold her head as he did.

is it me?

I was talking to HJR today about BK and I was giving her advice about it. We were talking about how sometimes you just have to see how things go and trust that life will take you where you need to be. And I told her it`s hard sometimes because we always want it to work out the way we want it to and we want it fast, we want it now. But sometimes there's lessons we have to learn along the way. 

As I re-read it, I wondered if I was even talking about her and BK anymore or if I was talking about myself. 

Heavy.

“To let true love remain unspoken is the quickest route to a heavy heart. –Warren Peace

Remind me.

If you still love me, don't just assume I know.

It's still you.

I wish that just once I could wake up or go to sleep without it being about him.