I don't want easy, I want crazy.

I don't want good and I don't want good enough.
I want can't sleep, can't breathe without your love.

No words left.

My heart hurts.

Live.

After everything, I have one thing to say: live.

some bend, some break.

My heart hurts. Or it's numb. Or I just don't really have any idea what to feel anymore. How to feel.

it's not supposed to be like this.

It's pretty amazing how far we've come with technology. I haven't talked to mom since last Monday because she's on her cruise and I'm basically on the verge of a mental breakdown. I miss her so much and I know that she would be able to say something that would make things better and make me believe that BB had to die for a reason. I just don't understand why so many lives must be lost so young.

Every day

That awkward moment when you listen to a song that completely reminds you of someone you’re not supposed to be missing.

Broken spirit.

I just feel broken.

Static.

I'm kind of tired of being the one that puts more into friendships. It's sometimes really hard being mature and motivated and ambitious. Like tonight I hung out with arguably my 3 best friends throughout middle and high school and I just feel old and boring around them. Around my friends, that's normal. We with movies and have one or two drinks instead of 10. It's not even that I care that they have 22 drinks.. It's that they judge when I only have 1 or 2. They make me feel bad for wanting to be successful ad taking my education and career seriously.
Even when I saw NB the other day she said she wasn't even really sure she wanted to teach etc. and I was just like doesn't anybody have ambitions? Like doesn't anybody that I was close with in high school want to move forward?