Grateful.

Yesterday a girl in my class said to me, do you wear Lancôme? And I was like no why? And she said well you just have such nice skin! 

I have never in my life felt like I have had nice skin. In fact it is one of the things I struggle with the most about myself. I feel so privileged to be with kids who build me up like that. I spend my days with kids that tell me you are so beautiful or you look so pretty today. And I need that. It is the most humbling thing on a day that I don't fee good about myself. On the days I don't fee good about myself to hear that someone thinks I'm beautiful. 

Worth the wait.

Internet gold

You didn't need a new jacket.

Tonight I said, "I like that jacket. Is it new?"

"Yeah, I bought it because someone told me I always wear the same outfits to work". 

I laughed but my heart fluttered a little. I think it's very endearing when he makes a point to take my opinion into consideration. 

Heavy.

It's really difficult when a student asks if I'm okay. B asked the other day if I was okay. I said yeah. He said you look really stressed. I told him I was just tired.
And I am. I am absolutely fucking exhausted. I barely sleep. I am so stressed. I have cried more in the last two months than in the last 2 years. I hate it. And I feel so helpless. I can't even control my emotions.
I am trying so hard to be strong. I am trying to be grateful and positive. I know it could be worse. I guess I just don't understand. Why another test? Why do some people always have to be strong. Is it ever going to end? Is there ever going to be a day when it's easy?
I feel so weighed down. Everything is heavy.

The tide.

There is a tide in the affairs of men....

One of those.

Today has been a really tough day. I just feel like I want to cry all day. 

How convenient, for you.

I really hate it when he plays the boss card.