Only hope.

I feel okay. I'm sad that he's leaving and I'm selfish because I want to see him and I know he has a lot of things to do and people to see before he goes. I know that all but I still want to spend time with him. I am sad because I'm gone the last 5 days before he leaves. And he hates leth and I know that. A small part of me hopes that on his way through, he stops to say goodbye. 

He leaves, for two years.

I have known for nearly two years that this was coming but only in the last two days, and especially the last few moments did I realize, just how real it is. Two years is a long time. I'm sure that it will pass by faster than I think, time always does. I suppose the best thing I can do is to trust him when he made the comment, we're already 5 years strong. 

I hate that I love it.

I hate that every time we speak he can reach right into my soul. 

I still love you.

“I can't hold on, but lettin' go, is something I can't do, is something I can't do, even if I wanted to." 

-Jason Aldean