Joe Bastianich.

So last night I look at J and I was like do you know who Joe Bastianich is? He's like ya I hate that guy why? I was like are you sure it's not your goal in life to be him? J's like fuck no. People always say that. I'm like well you're a bald, Italian restauranteur who wears nice suits and kicks. He's like fuck off does he do that? I just died laughing.
J's like fuck T even said, "hey Joe" to me tonight when he walked in.
I found the entire situation quite humorous.

What a wonderful human.

I find it so incredibly endearing that after everything J always makes a conscious effort to say goodbye to me before he leaves work.
Tonight he was getting a drink and he's like, "B I'm..." And before he could even finish I said, "I know". He's says, "okay I just wanted to say bye to you now because I'm not coming back out here before I leave... Goodbye".
I just appreciate that type of thoughtfulness. I appreciate that he takes the time and more than anything, I guess I just really appreciate he cares.

The greatest shut down of all time.

What colour are your pants?

I love how he reacts when I stop by on days I don't work. I walked in today and he goes,"HI! How are you?!" His enthusiasm makes my heart melt because I know he cares. The first thing he does is ask what colour my pants are. Brown? Reddish brown? Maroon? haha yes they're maroon J. Okay then they work. CG and I are like what works? CG says like the shape works? He's like with your black jacket and boots. 

Then CG says is that all you came for? To ask us what colour your pants were? Bye!
So basically 10 minute conversation about my pants hahahah. I just love both of them.
Trust me to fall for a dude who dresses better than I do.

But I'm grateful.

I just don't know why he cares the way that he does.

J.

I don't honestly know what I'd do without him. He has been such a pillar of strength in the last 6 months. He is so incredibly supportive and I am so grateful for him.

How I feel today.

People disappoint you. I get that, I mean I kind of expect that. But what if you wake up one day and realize you're the disappointment.