Your life would suck.

He came up to me tonight in the middle of revenue, graised my arms and says, "what would I do without you?" Now normally I wouldn't think anything of this, but he despises when people touch him. It gave me chills and still does because he doesn't do that ever. I just want this so immensely that every single fibre of my being tingles.

This reminds me of you.

"So avoid using the word very, because it's lazy. A man is not very tired. He is exhausted. Don't use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys -- to woo women-- and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do."
- Robin Williams, Dead Poet's Society

Can you teach me how to milk a cow?

On ANOTHER note, I fucking love J. I fall harder and harder for him every single day. Yesterday, I asked if I could bring my sister in for a glass of wine and dessert because she was in Calg and he said yes! I'll even sit her in treehouse so she can put her foot up.
The fact that he is so thoughtful honestly blows my mind. When we got there he came and pulled up a chair and sat down beside me for like 10 minutes. I have never seen him sit down at a table with any other employee or their family when they are there. He sits down when he talks to his friends or family but that's it. He didn't even sit down with K for her birthday.
He sat down and spoke with B and I about lots of things. I loved it. Then before he left, he made me a latte then came and said goodbye.
I am so happy that B met him. I am happy that she got to see why he makes me so very giddy. She was like he's nervous around you. You guys flirt and it's cute. I was happy she noticed. She pulled out her psychology and was like his body language said this, this and this and I just laughed.
Today he seemed kind of grumpy and then he was actually not grumpy he's like SO and he tells me that KR the psycho girl we work with who's in love with him found out about B (her best friend who has hooked up with J). And he's like I can't wait to hear what she has to say! I'm going to tell her I'm sleeping with you and that you are a FREAK in bed hahahaha.
I just died laughing I'm like okay J that's going to go over well. May as well just tell her that you slept with both of us at the same time and she wasn't invited.

Fun for now.

So Thursday night, well technically Friday morning I slept with M. I was so incredibly late to meet him for a drink. I felt so bad! When I got there, I had a glass of wine. Then I had 3 or 4 more hahaha. Eventually we left and went to his home when The Keg was closing. We just spoke for hours and then we made out and things progressed hahaha then we went to bed and then in the morning it was honestly just wonderful. We just lied in bed and talked and cuddled and he kissed my neck and my head and played with my hair. We fooled around and he was just fun.
We talked about how neither of us wanted a relationship nor did we want to ruin work for me and being a patron for him. So we just said we'll hang out and be friends and just kind of whatever.
I am not sure how I am at a place where I'm okay with this but I am. I actually am good with just hooking up with him. I don't think it would be fair to him to progress further because I have feelings for J. That's where my heart is so it is what it is with M. I don't want to date M anyways to be perfectly honest. I mean I like him but I'm just not at a place where I want to party every weekend and during the week sometimes too. I also don't know that I want to date someone who's 22 and clearly not at a point where he wants to settle down.

Enough said.

What an interesting few days.

What a ridiculous notion.

Girls are crazy. Actually. Last night before J left I was like wait! So he did and I was like this is just cynical I just wanted to tell you I don't work tomorrow because you're going home. He's like rude! Now I'm definitely going home! He's like by the way did you hear we planned our day off together?

I was like what do you mean? 

He's like girls asked if we both have Tuesdays off for a reason so I was like yeah we just spend the wholeeeee day in bed. 

I died laughing. Like I didn't even really think about the fact that we had the same day off let alone plan it.