Thursday, March 8, 2012

one part brick.

LG and PS came here last night. And I know I should try and forgive him but I just can't. I know he's trying to be a better person but there's a part of me that will never forgive him. I just think she deserves better.
I'm so confused lately. I'm usually the one with all the drama. Not self-induced but usually I somehow get involved. And lately, it has nothing to do with me. It's a nice change. I'm doing well actually. I miss number twelve sometimes, but I know I'm where I need to be. And I think that's the most important thing. For the first time in a long time, I'm content. Yes sometimes it'd be nice to have someone but I'm actually pretty satisfied with where I am in life. I'm busy and I am content spending time on myself. I like my life. The gym, school, work. I just want to do something in life. I want to be productive. I want to help somebody.
I'm excited to go home and party with my friends and just have fun. I like that people trust me and confide in me. I know how few people S trusts, especially with important things and for her to confide in me and actually take my opinion into consideration lately, it matters to me. It means something to me that people tell me things and trust me. And it means something to me that I'm finally settled and I can be supportive of people in a more dedicated and real way. I just want my friends to know that I am here for them. You know? I feel like after a year and a half of hell I can finally be the strong one again, the person I used to be.

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