make believe.

If you watch gossip girl, you probably ended up in tears or with a broken heart like I did. Honestly, it's hard for me to watch that show. It sounds stupid but Chuck and Blair should be together, they are destined to be together.
This here is my completely naive, dying-to-witness-true-love-believer side of me. It's rare. And I guess why I find this so sad is because that used to be number 12 and I. We had been through so much on and off shit but at the end of the day we always found ourselves back at each other. These was this mangetic pull that always brought us together, a sort of rare love.
I honestly couldn't tell you where we stand now. But I can tell you it's a whole lot easier to pretend you don't love someone when you don't have to talk to them or see them everyday, when your friend group is different, when you force yourself to delete the drafted text you've written, or hang up the phone before it completes dialing.
Number twelve's sister texted me about it tonight, Gossip Girl I mean. And  we talked about it and love and such and it's sometimes hard to talk with her about it because she's never cared about someone like that. She has never fully loved someone in the way that the person has the ability to shatter you and put you back togeher in a matter of moments with no words spoken. She has never loved someone so much that she'd suffer her entire life for their happiness, or hurt for someone that can't hurt for themself. And it's hard for me because that's the way I love her little brother; and she knows that.