Heart, head or absolute chance?

I started thinking about serving somewhere else. I am struggling because I don't know if it's in my best or worst interest to continue to work for J. My problem with going somewhere else is that I won't get where I am anytime soon because I can't dedicate myself until July like I did last year for the boys. It would take months and I just don't know if I want to do that all over. I was working like 50-60 hour weeks.
I like picking my shifts and I like not closing. I like knowing manager codes (most of the time) and I like that the boys trust and respect me and especially that they value me.
The problem is J. Or the solution. He's an imperative part of who I am at this point, especially in the last year. He's changed me immensely and I know he had no idea the extent to which he has altered the course of my life. I recognize he's only altered it because I let him.
I think the thing is, I've reached a point in my life where I realize I can survive without him. I'll be fine just the same as I would be without anyone else. I don't really believe in the notion that "I cannot survive without ~him~"  or any other person for that matter. I used to believe that about sunshine, and then about number twelve. The truth is, I will survive without anyone, no matter how much I value that person and their contribution to my life.
I suppose, the question now is, do I want to live without him?