I was driving home today in the rain thinking about how bad I'd love to just have number twelve kiss me in the rain. I just miss the kid. I think I'd be okay if we hung out every once in awhile or talked even or if I knew he still cared at all.
I started thinking about this time last year and how we just spend every night watching a movie or cooking or cuddling. And I started thinking about May long last year; and how he told me he'd rather spend the night at home with just me. It broke my heart today when I heard he went out camping last night.
The entire situation with him and I just breaks my heart. And I'm just trying so hard to believe in us because I really want to believe in love but I just have no reason to believe it's real. It's all just an illusion.
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