Butterflies.

So I am sitting here thinking about today. I am supposed to go walk Duke later and I am like playing in my head all these things and I am terrified it will be awkward. Like I really do want to go walk Duke but I'd be lying if I said I didn't have feelings for J. 

I know all these other girls who he is as a person and I haven't been able to say that about ANY male in a long time. I have basically been looking at men who are physically attractive because I didn't want to get hurt like the whole number twelve situation. And now I see J every day and I find myself wishing I was at work so I could spend more time with him.
And I know that some of the people I'm close with like CG and ER are starting to notice. ER always makes comments but she has been rooting for us the entire time. CG makes comments and I think she knows but she knows I won't act on it so she doesn't explicitly say anything. I hated lying to her last week when she asked me but I am just not ready to own up to it because if she told him it would be so awkward every day at work. 

Last night I was literally planning WHAT TO WEAR today. I am NOT this person. Like I'm going to hang out with his dog hahaha how ridiculous am I? I wonder what Duke would like me to wear. Fuck. I sound so stupid.