the fence type.

I HATE PHILOSOPHY!
But to be fair, I hate it in the way that I am a very wishy-washy, depends-on-the-situation type. I am a fence rider for sure. I hate making big decisions and when I do, I literally hmm and haw about it and analyze every possible outcome. And once I actually make the decision, I go over absolutely everything I could have done differently, how different my life would be, etc. It sounds stupid, but I don't know how else to be. I am constantly analzying others and society and especially myself on how to be different, how to be better.
I actually really enjoy philosophy. I like reading about controversial things that require such intense thought. Things that people can have a real conversation about rather than me roll my eyes while you tell me about your alcoholism and one-night stands.
I mean I'm writing a paper on free will right now and I have to discuss whether I think that it human actions are the result of determinism or simply chance. And to be perfectly honest, I honestly believe in determinism. I believe that every thing that has happened, whether we can explain it or understand it, has an antecedent cause. I think that every decision we make matters. And I have argued with people about this on end. Ayer suggests that we are perhaps 'co-conspirators' in our fate instead of slaves to it. And I think he's right. I mean people have tried to argue that a family hit by a drunk driver had absolutely no choice in their death. But they did. They may not have known it, but leaving at the time that they did, under the conditions that they did, led them to their fate. So it really wasn't fate at all. It was a choice.