number 12 and i have been fighting a lot lately. it's starting to really take a toll on both of us. however some of the things we're fighting about are pretty justified, i think. being in a relationship is hard and with him trying to play hockey, most of his time is devoted to working out and getting in shape; so much so that he's leaving in a week to go trian in lethbridge with his sister's boyfriend who just happens to train nhl players. i don't know it just sucks because i work so much and he trains so much that we don't really see each other. and i get frustrated because the one day i want to go out in 3 months, he doesn't want to come with me. and i don't understand that. we don't do anything ever because we're both too tired so we just hang out with his family or my family or just us and relax. he doesn't drink ever anymore and i can't seem to figure out why. it's one thing to not go get trashed 6 days a week or even every weekend but to not have a glass of wine with the family every once in awhile is just really hard for me to comprehend. i suppose i'm starting to miss who he used to be. i mean i like who he is and his ambition and will to do soomething but i miss us doing things instead of staying home and being 'that couple' 7 nights a week. i don't need to drink i just want to do something.
and another thing that really gets me is that he is so frustrating. i don't ask for a lot, i'm not needy or controlling. but when i have a really bad day or i am so incredibly sick that i get sent home 20 minutes after i get to work, i want him to show me he cares. he tells me he cares but dear boy showing me you care is something else. when he doesn't even come see how i'm doing after he saw how sick i am, or when he hangs out with friends and can't even say hi oin his way home. it's little things that really bother me.
who knows though, maybe i'm just crazy.
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