the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

do you think it's okay to replace someone you loved. or is that cheating. i can't figure out if i'm actually over him or if i'm just pretending he's not there, again, because i don't avoid him completely. this time it's easy, we don't go to the same school so there's no chance of seeing him in the halls. he's not in any of my classes like before. we don't hang out with many of the same people anymore; at least, not at the same time. 

i'm still super on the fence about friday. i want to go, i do but i just don't know if it will reverse the progress. and yet, i haven't felt this healthy in 3 years. i mean maybe i should talk to number twelve being that he will be choked if i go; however, in saying that he might encourage me to go as a test. so he knows if i'm really over him or if we are going to have a repeat of last time. 

i'm just really not sure what to do. 

i'm stumped.