all you're ever gonna be is mean.

i bet you got pushed around, somebody made you cold;
but the cycle ends right now cause you can't lead me down that road.
and you don't know what you don't know.

only a few more hours.

done midterms, check.
packing, in progress.
home for five whole days, doesn't get much better than that.

life unexpected.

what happened to guys night??
what always happens, girls ruined it.

red wine is my love.

my roommate is really growing on me. we're thoroughly enjoying some quality cw time right now. haha he watched the end of one tree hill with me and now we're watching life unexpected. haha and wine and beer of course. it's quite a lovely way to end a terrible week of studying.

i bet we'd find it more often if we looked at it that way.

happiness is a condition not a destination.

wolfblass yellow label.

red wine is God's gift to the world, especially me after a day with 2 midterms and a terrible assignment.

tomorrow can't come fast enough.

i blew my econ midterm today and also got my history paper back and bombed that. i got 92 on my native studies paper though yay. but i am extremely unprepared for the psych test i'm going to write. i could study for 3 days and then write it but instead i'm going to write it tonight and go home tomorrow. i cannot wait to be home.

live with no regrets.

it's hard to hate what got me here.

patsy cline.

you want me to act like we've never kissed.
you want me to forget, pretend like we've never met.
and i've tried, and i've tried, but i haven't yet.
you walk by and i fall to pieces.

robert frost says so.

love is an irrestistable desire to be irresistably desired.

why is he so nice to me?

"i've come to the conclusion that chocolate is my weakness."
"finally, we found a flaw."

nothing does.

you still don't get it do you.
none of it matters without you.

every single night.

did some things you can't speak of,
but at night you live it all again.

love is pain.

never get into a relationship, they only equal hurt.

insomnia.

as per usual i didn't fall asleep until like 2 hours later last night.

the human condition.

like i said, i need sleep. it's almost 11. friday i went to bed at like 9:30. seriously, i'm going to sleep.

be strong, push through.

i think there i something wrong with me. i hate the doctor but i actually have to go friday. i have slept an excessive amount lately and that's unusual for me. i usually sleep like 6-7 hours and i'm golden but i've been exhausted lately. let's hope it's anemia, that's a fixable problem and is unlikely to kill me (i hope). i'd prefer anemia to mono. i suppose it could just be exhaustion. like complete physical, mental and emotional exhaustion. it has been a long few months and that could very well be the issue. it's getting to the point when i burn out. november does that to me.

stolen from s, love it.

"you know what i think we are most afraid of? not knowing. not knowing whether it's all really worth it. not knowing if you should give up or keep fighting. not knowing why you do the things you do; not knowing the purpose. it's like when you're little and you touch the stove and get burned, because you didn't know that it was hot. not knowing has always hurt us, from the very beginning."

the story of us.

yesterday i wasn't feeling well, so i layed down and had a nap on his bed. he came in his room, kissed my forehead and said if you need anything i'm only a few feet away. i'll be studying and watching over you making sure you're alright. then he covered me in blankets and waited patiently for me to wake up.

today our alarm went off at 7:30. i think he got up at about 8- 8:30 and he said go back to sleep gorgeous, close your eyes, i'll wake you up in a half hour. then again he kissed my forehead, and tucked me in so i wouldn't be cold without his arms around me. a short while later he came and sat of his bed with a nice fresh mug of coffee, put it in front of my nose and woke me up. then we layed in his bed for a good hour or two just talking and laughing and seriously enjoying being together. we talked about the future and where it might take us and he reminded me to just enjoy the little things and live for right now. then we spent the day doing homework.

i've found you find strength in your moments of weakness.

i'm really quite drained right now. i'm in excruciating pain, screw being a girl. also my weekend was lovely. i spent two days with number 12. we didn't do much other than study and enjoy each others company. it was perfect. he's not really the open your door, chivalrous, bullshit and try and impress you type. he is just him which i find intoxicating. he was incredibly sweet this weekend, thoughtful and it was really nice to just be us.