love will save the day.

i saw number twelve today for the first time in forever. like legitimately almost a month. he is home from his trip and that boy is so damn sexy. he's all tanned and ripped and ugh. i was dying because he even wore his glasses. plus he had the truck = boys that drive trucks are sexy. we went grocery shopping. cute right? yeah we're like the worst ex-boyfriend/girlfriend ever. we do lame things together and i love it. it was hard though, seeing him. i miss him. i'm a pretty big mess about the whole situation. i also talked to sc last night, drunk. smooth. i think he's super sexy but he has this other love interest and i'm nowhere near over number twelve nor do i really want to be with someone other than number twelve. however, sc is a hockey player. not good, but still. and he is so nice. we had a long drawn out chat about his ex and how she cheated on him and how i'm still head over heels in love with number twelve. this is what my life has come down to; talking about number twelve, writing about number twelve, thinking about number twelve, crying about number twelve, pretending i'm okay when really i'm dying without number twelve. it's all about number twelve. i love that boy.