so i overanalyze things. is it really that big of a problem. okay so here is today's current issue.
today i was on my way to starbucks and my phone started ringing. it was nan and she said my RESP cheque was here. and i was sooo excited; macbook pro here i come! and then i went and picked it up and it was more than i thought. well wicked, i'm not complaining, now i can pay for the entire thing right off the bat. but then i went to the bank and they're like okay well since it's a personal cheque, it's going to have a week hold on it. and i way like gay; part of that was lethbridge spending money. but then i started driving home (have i told you i think highways heal broken hearts... well driving fixes all my problems). i got to thinking and i was like holy man. like what if i was smart about this money. what if i save it. i mean what if i invest it into something else. everyone always joked about how spoiled i am and i have no business sense and i'm just daddy's girl that gets everything i want and i'll never make it in the real world or any of it. and i wonder how that happened. i just to save all money and i was smart about it and then i just got used to having things handed to me. then today i was thinking about it and i was like why did i used to be like that, like what changed. well i think i started to live for the moment instead of plan for the future. i forgot why i planned for the future. i saw what my mom went through, and put us through and i see what mlr's mom is going through and what she is putting her through. and i just never want to have to go through that again. i don't wanna put myself through it or my hypothetical children. it's a macbook pro. and yes i really really want one. but i also have a perfectly fine working hp laptop and i can start saving for that in january when i get a job. i don't neeed a macbook pro. they're beautiful and functional and work much better with less virus. but i don't need it. be smart silly girl. do something you know is right.
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