I'm so stupid because I'm sitting here praying that I get a text from a number that isn't saved in my phone. I'm more than keenly aware of the fact it's not going to happen but that doesn't make me want it less. I'm stupid because it's not romantic and I know that and I'm perfectly okay with that. But I'm confused. I'm sad. I miss him.
If I'm honest, I'm hurt he wasn't there last night when I needed him to be. It kind of feels like no one was. I know it's my own fault but it doesn't hurt any less.
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