Long weekend.

I'm extremely happy that J is gone for 4 days but I'm so jealous. It will be so weird for him to not be there. Like he is always there when I work. He makes me laugh. He cheers me up by making fun of me or other girls. I am just so unsure of what to think or what I think.
I like J. I have feelings for J. But I'm not his type and he is not mine. It just seems easy though. It was as soon as we met. I don't know what to do.
Today ER asked me if we hooked up and I told her no and she probed a LOT which I get I would too I'm nosy. But she said just keep it no emotions and it will be fine. And I said I don't think I would be able to engage in something like that as much as I sometimes wish I could. I left out the part about my emotions already being involved thus why that would NEVER work with J especially.